Ever want to talk to a perfect stranger? And you don't even have the safety of shared interests to fall back on? Omegle allows you to chat with random strangers all over the planet. Shockingly enough, there is a fairly high percentage of pervs and losers. I have one convo start off with "Omegle is required by law to tell you that you are chatting with a registered sex offender" or something very similar. That conversation ended when I said I was legal. Pervert #2 threatened to rape me if I didn't say I was 15.
It wasn't all bad, though. Had a nice chat with a dude in Boston who owns a Jack Russell and is involved in MMA. Then I had an interesting convo with a young dude in Australia. He tried to fuck with me so I condescended to him. Things went much better after that. It's amazing how fast people straighten out when you call them 12 year olds. Anyway, if you ever read this, random 23 year old Australian stranger, thanks for the distraction and I'll be sure to check out Top Gear next time it is on.
Although I had not head of Omegle until yesterday, it's been around since March of this year. Tumblr has pages and pages of Omegle conversations where people fuck with each other, or sometimes have these funny and brilliant chats about zombies. Or sometimes it all just comes together.
I don't know that I'll spend a lot of time at Omegle, but it was an entertaining 45 minutes.
Showing posts with label internet. Show all posts
Showing posts with label internet. Show all posts
12 August 2009
28 January 2009
Broken and Disconnected
My boot broke today. I have a sort of old, but in really good shape (or so I thought), pair of Columbia boots. I got them a couple of years ago but didn't wear them much. Honestly, they look about as they did straight out of the box.
Since we got a decent amount of snow last night, I hauled the old boots out this AM. The right boot was a slightly different shade of blue than the left, but I figured there was some salt residue from the last time I wore them. The boots did their job as I cleared the wet, heavy snow off my car. They kept my feet warm and dry. It was a bit tricky to drive, but I managed OK.
I get to work and swap the boots for my work shoes. Did you know that if you haven't shaved your legs for 2+ months and wear Columbia snow boots it really hurts? Imagine tiny little evil elves yanking on the hairs on your ankle. Still not gonna shave. Moving on. It wasn't until I went to put the boots back on for my break that a coworker noticed the cracks.
Yes, there was a crack running all the way around the rubber part of my right boot. The boot that was slightly discolored, remember? I'm bummed, but I figure I'll break out the temperature-resistant tape and patch things up. I don't especially care how pretty they look. Though, I did get many compliments on my boots.
As I'm walking outside, I hear this crunching noise. I look down at my afflicted boot and see pieces of the rubber flaking away. I now have gaping holes where the rubber used to be. I may take a pic later and post it. Several people said I should call Columbia because that should not happen. I don't know that they will help me out, but I may try anyway.
That's the broken - here is the disconnected. jr and Jewfro were over the other night. jr and I made bacon cookies while Jewfro worked his magic and made it possible for me to Stumble without being tethered to my modem. There were some quirks: the network would say disconnected when I was still online, the icon showed a disconnect, but I didn't care. Access is access.
I don't remember if it was Monday or Tuesday, but I was having serious problems staying online. Also, it took an inordinate amount of time to connect (or not connect). I tried resetting the modem, restarting my computer, bupkes. I can't stay online wirelessly for more than 10 minutes or so. What is the point of having an awesome new toy if I can't go online? As it is, I'm posting this at work.
Oh, and nothing to do with anything, but I am surrounded by incompetents at work. Too many chiefs for us Indians.
Since we got a decent amount of snow last night, I hauled the old boots out this AM. The right boot was a slightly different shade of blue than the left, but I figured there was some salt residue from the last time I wore them. The boots did their job as I cleared the wet, heavy snow off my car. They kept my feet warm and dry. It was a bit tricky to drive, but I managed OK.
I get to work and swap the boots for my work shoes. Did you know that if you haven't shaved your legs for 2+ months and wear Columbia snow boots it really hurts? Imagine tiny little evil elves yanking on the hairs on your ankle. Still not gonna shave. Moving on. It wasn't until I went to put the boots back on for my break that a coworker noticed the cracks.
Yes, there was a crack running all the way around the rubber part of my right boot. The boot that was slightly discolored, remember? I'm bummed, but I figure I'll break out the temperature-resistant tape and patch things up. I don't especially care how pretty they look. Though, I did get many compliments on my boots.
As I'm walking outside, I hear this crunching noise. I look down at my afflicted boot and see pieces of the rubber flaking away. I now have gaping holes where the rubber used to be. I may take a pic later and post it. Several people said I should call Columbia because that should not happen. I don't know that they will help me out, but I may try anyway.
That's the broken - here is the disconnected. jr and Jewfro were over the other night. jr and I made bacon cookies while Jewfro worked his magic and made it possible for me to Stumble without being tethered to my modem. There were some quirks: the network would say disconnected when I was still online, the icon showed a disconnect, but I didn't care. Access is access.
I don't remember if it was Monday or Tuesday, but I was having serious problems staying online. Also, it took an inordinate amount of time to connect (or not connect). I tried resetting the modem, restarting my computer, bupkes. I can't stay online wirelessly for more than 10 minutes or so. What is the point of having an awesome new toy if I can't go online? As it is, I'm posting this at work.
Oh, and nothing to do with anything, but I am surrounded by incompetents at work. Too many chiefs for us Indians.
13 December 2008
Apparently, Stupid is Worse than Mean
I've earned a small degree of infamy on the 'net for an unintentionally stupid comment I made on a blog. This particular blog will periodically post photos of celebs and we are encouraged to make clever comments about the celeb's hair, outfit, facial expression, etc. The one thing that was always discouraged was body-snarking. I can understand this - most people have had some sort of self-esteem issues over the years. My last boyfriend was super skinny. I called him Stringbean. It took me a while to realize that it wasn't any less bad to tease him about being skinny as it would be to tease someone about being overweight.
Anyway, I did my level best to avoid any body comments. One day, a photo of Madonna was posted. Most of you are probably aware that Madonna is an exercise fiend. She has made no secret of her dedication to fitness. Another commenter said something about Madonna's lack of body fat. I said something about Madonna's visible veins. Veins that were visible because of her lack of body fat. Oy, I got flamed and I got voted worst comment of the day (which I covered in a previous post).
In my defense, I was not maligning Madonna's body. What do I care if you want to do lots of yoga or Pilates or eat a raw food diet? It's your life; live it how you want. I was merely voicing my amazement at her low body fat percentage. I mean, come on, the woman is RIPPED.
I went on the site today and there was a post about making comments about some of the super-skinny celebs. Many people feel that it is their bounden duty to offer this advice: Eat a cheeseburger. There were a couple of paragraphs about the unkindness of body-snarking and my stupid veiny Madonna comment was referred to. For fuck's sake people! I've read some seriously mean-spirited comments on that site and you drag out mine? At worst, it was poorly-worded. Did I say "Ewwwwwww! OMG Madonna is scary skinny? Get that chick a sammich STAT!!!1!!"? Nope, but somehow I got called out.
This stupid mess made me realize that internet relationships, regardless of how good they seem to be, are mostly nothing. I don't know if it is the anonominity or what, but people feel far more comfortable shitting on someone online. Who am I kidding? Of course it's the anonominity. There are no real consequences (the whole MySpace bullying issue notwithstanding). If I had made that comment about Madonna to any of my friends, they probably wouldn't have said anything at all. The certainly wouldn't have jumped all over me with comments like: "Oh yes, she has veins. How passe!" and the like. While I realize that tone is nearly impossible to convey online, give me a little credit people, hmmmm? Do you really think I am unfamiliar with the existence of the circulatory system? After all, it pumps the blood into my occasionally non-functioning brain.
So I will admit to stupidity but I WILL NOT admit to body-snarking. Sometimes people, stupid happens.
Anyway, I did my level best to avoid any body comments. One day, a photo of Madonna was posted. Most of you are probably aware that Madonna is an exercise fiend. She has made no secret of her dedication to fitness. Another commenter said something about Madonna's lack of body fat. I said something about Madonna's visible veins. Veins that were visible because of her lack of body fat. Oy, I got flamed and I got voted worst comment of the day (which I covered in a previous post).
In my defense, I was not maligning Madonna's body. What do I care if you want to do lots of yoga or Pilates or eat a raw food diet? It's your life; live it how you want. I was merely voicing my amazement at her low body fat percentage. I mean, come on, the woman is RIPPED.
I went on the site today and there was a post about making comments about some of the super-skinny celebs. Many people feel that it is their bounden duty to offer this advice: Eat a cheeseburger. There were a couple of paragraphs about the unkindness of body-snarking and my stupid veiny Madonna comment was referred to. For fuck's sake people! I've read some seriously mean-spirited comments on that site and you drag out mine? At worst, it was poorly-worded. Did I say "Ewwwwwww! OMG Madonna is scary skinny? Get that chick a sammich STAT!!!1!!"? Nope, but somehow I got called out.
This stupid mess made me realize that internet relationships, regardless of how good they seem to be, are mostly nothing. I don't know if it is the anonominity or what, but people feel far more comfortable shitting on someone online. Who am I kidding? Of course it's the anonominity. There are no real consequences (the whole MySpace bullying issue notwithstanding). If I had made that comment about Madonna to any of my friends, they probably wouldn't have said anything at all. The certainly wouldn't have jumped all over me with comments like: "Oh yes, she has veins. How passe!" and the like. While I realize that tone is nearly impossible to convey online, give me a little credit people, hmmmm? Do you really think I am unfamiliar with the existence of the circulatory system? After all, it pumps the blood into my occasionally non-functioning brain.
So I will admit to stupidity but I WILL NOT admit to body-snarking. Sometimes people, stupid happens.
11 June 2008
Uncertainty Principle
For those of you who thought I was going to be talking Heisenberg and quantum mechanics, sorry.
I did something kind of ballsy the other day. I sent my cyberboy a message. I told him that I think he's "pretty fucking awesome" and I'd like to buy him a beverage. I did this Monday, in the early evening. As of Wednesday a.m., I have received no reply. I attempted to craft a message that would force some sort of reply, whether it be yea or nay, but I suppose it is possible that he would choose not to reply at all. Not the most polite thing to do, but it ultimately makes no difference.
Here's where the uncertainty comes in; I decided to check my sent messages. You know, on the off chance that I dithered over wording too long, my session timed out, and said message didn't go through. Sure enough, I have only one sent message and that one was from a week and a half ago. Now I have to decide if I assume the message went through and he opted not to reply, or if I send a follow-up message. I hate follow-up messages.
"Hey! I sent you a message a couple of days ago, uh, but I don't think it went through. So, uh, I thought I'd send you another message to see if you got the 1st one." Awkward, right?
Summation: I don't know if my message was received and whether I should send a follow-up. Should I just let it go and chalk it up to experience? Display some stalkerism and send another message? Thoughts?
Update: Message resent. Waiting begins. Belly rumbly.
I did something kind of ballsy the other day. I sent my cyberboy a message. I told him that I think he's "pretty fucking awesome" and I'd like to buy him a beverage. I did this Monday, in the early evening. As of Wednesday a.m., I have received no reply. I attempted to craft a message that would force some sort of reply, whether it be yea or nay, but I suppose it is possible that he would choose not to reply at all. Not the most polite thing to do, but it ultimately makes no difference.
Here's where the uncertainty comes in; I decided to check my sent messages. You know, on the off chance that I dithered over wording too long, my session timed out, and said message didn't go through. Sure enough, I have only one sent message and that one was from a week and a half ago. Now I have to decide if I assume the message went through and he opted not to reply, or if I send a follow-up message. I hate follow-up messages.
"Hey! I sent you a message a couple of days ago, uh, but I don't think it went through. So, uh, I thought I'd send you another message to see if you got the 1st one." Awkward, right?
Summation: I don't know if my message was received and whether I should send a follow-up. Should I just let it go and chalk it up to experience? Display some stalkerism and send another message? Thoughts?
Update: Message resent. Waiting begins. Belly rumbly.
06 June 2008
Why I Hate The Internet Revisited
This is going to be one of those things that says far more about me than it does about other people. Fair warning.
I know I'm not the smartest, funniest, wittiest, snappiest, etc. person on the planet. I am aware that I am, at this very moment, surrounded by people who are more gifted than I. People who write better, make better jokes, and can discuss social theory with more élan.
Now that I have thoroughly convinced you of my inadequacies, allow me to explain where I am coming from.
I got slammed for a comment I made today on a blog. I have always had an issue with being perceived as dumb or slow-witted. Maybe it's because I have always relied on my brains to get me through life. It is definitely important to me that people think I'm bright. I don't know why. Regardless of where it stems from, it is real and rearing its self-esteem destroying head, drooling uncertainty on my forehead.
Am I wallowing? Yes I am. Maybe I wouldn't be feeling so bad if it weren't for the fact that the fridge I stored my lunch in today is being cleaned out this weekend and the bitches are going to throw out a perfectly good piece of my tupperware. Or maybe it's because I can't seem to make myself take a chance of something that I really want. It has been a long time since I've spiraled down like this and it sucks the root. I've had enough therapy to recognize the signs of depression. I see these things happening and I can't be bothered to change anything. Oh sure, there will be short spurts of optimism and activity, but they don't last. I'll get angry and sad and want to throw things or kick things. Thankfully for my feet and my things, I don't do that anymore.
If you stuck around through that mess of self-pity, here's the reason I still hate the internet. It isn't significantly divergent from my original reason - I meet smart, funny, insightful, witty people and I feel like a three-year old on the high dive. I'm in the deep-end and I left the water wings at home. End pool analogy.
"Just go off-line!" you're saying. "If you're so fucking miserable, stop doing the thing that makes you miserable, asshole." I can't hide from every little thing that causes me to re-evaluate who I am. Plus, I need to learn not to base my sense of self-worth on what my fellow commenters think of me.
I know I'm not the smartest, funniest, wittiest, snappiest, etc. person on the planet. I am aware that I am, at this very moment, surrounded by people who are more gifted than I. People who write better, make better jokes, and can discuss social theory with more élan.
Now that I have thoroughly convinced you of my inadequacies, allow me to explain where I am coming from.
I got slammed for a comment I made today on a blog. I have always had an issue with being perceived as dumb or slow-witted. Maybe it's because I have always relied on my brains to get me through life. It is definitely important to me that people think I'm bright. I don't know why. Regardless of where it stems from, it is real and rearing its self-esteem destroying head, drooling uncertainty on my forehead.
Am I wallowing? Yes I am. Maybe I wouldn't be feeling so bad if it weren't for the fact that the fridge I stored my lunch in today is being cleaned out this weekend and the bitches are going to throw out a perfectly good piece of my tupperware. Or maybe it's because I can't seem to make myself take a chance of something that I really want. It has been a long time since I've spiraled down like this and it sucks the root. I've had enough therapy to recognize the signs of depression. I see these things happening and I can't be bothered to change anything. Oh sure, there will be short spurts of optimism and activity, but they don't last. I'll get angry and sad and want to throw things or kick things. Thankfully for my feet and my things, I don't do that anymore.
If you stuck around through that mess of self-pity, here's the reason I still hate the internet. It isn't significantly divergent from my original reason - I meet smart, funny, insightful, witty people and I feel like a three-year old on the high dive. I'm in the deep-end and I left the water wings at home. End pool analogy.
"Just go off-line!" you're saying. "If you're so fucking miserable, stop doing the thing that makes you miserable, asshole." I can't hide from every little thing that causes me to re-evaluate who I am. Plus, I need to learn not to base my sense of self-worth on what my fellow commenters think of me.
05 June 2008
Ugh
Some times I am so disappointed in myself.
Remember a couple of posts ago when I stated that it was easier to be witty and charming online? I was wrong.
Case in point: I made a comment - nothing super insightful or funny, but I went for a cutesy vibe and now I feel that I failed miserably.
I don't know why I'm obsessing so much. I shouldn't flatter myself into thinking that my internet friends think of me at all once they've finished scrolling by my comments. I know that, with a few exceptions, I don't. Does that stop me from fanatically refreshing the page? It does not.
I've been sitting at my desk for the last hour or so, feeling my insides contracting with the icky embarassment I'm wallowing in. Yes, I realize I should let it go. Didn't I just say that I didn't think my internet friends thought about me? Yes. That doesn't stop me from wanting them (specifically my cyberboy) to. In a positive manner, of course. I swear, I'm not an idiot. Really.
Remember a couple of posts ago when I stated that it was easier to be witty and charming online? I was wrong.
Case in point: I made a comment - nothing super insightful or funny, but I went for a cutesy vibe and now I feel that I failed miserably.
I don't know why I'm obsessing so much. I shouldn't flatter myself into thinking that my internet friends think of me at all once they've finished scrolling by my comments. I know that, with a few exceptions, I don't. Does that stop me from fanatically refreshing the page? It does not.
I've been sitting at my desk for the last hour or so, feeling my insides contracting with the icky embarassment I'm wallowing in. Yes, I realize I should let it go. Didn't I just say that I didn't think my internet friends thought about me? Yes. That doesn't stop me from wanting them (specifically my cyberboy) to. In a positive manner, of course. I swear, I'm not an idiot. Really.
22 May 2008
Intellectual Crushes - Why I Hate the Internet
You may be goggling at my subject and wondering, "But-but-how could you hate the internet? It is a wonderful tool and helps pass the time when one should be a busy little worker bee." Granted, but I still hate it. This says more about me than the 'net.
Let me spin a scenario for you: You have a celeb-crush, whether it be actor, model, rock star. You happily spend your time Googling said crush. Pics become wallpapers and screensavers. You absorb the minutiae of your crush's life: bios, loves, hates. It is easy to embrace this mild stalkerism because celebrities are pretty much public property. What happens when you are crushing on a fellow commentator on a blog that you frequent?
Such is my dilemma. I am in love with someone's brain. His big, juicy, warped, and lovely brain. I am showing all the classic signs of infatuation: craziness, jitteriness, the desire to know every little thing about him. There is also the "do I comment on his comment?" and the "oooooo, he responded to my comment! yay!" I get the warm fuzzies when I read his blog. I get moments of panic when it seems he is referring to a girlfriend. I want him to want me for my brain, too.
Why is this a problem? It's only a problem in the same way any crush is a problem, I suppose. I worry that if I ever do meet him, I won't be smart enough. It's easy to be amusing, engaging, entertaining, and awesome when you're online because you have time to think. I've never made an especially good first impression on guys. What is snarky and fun online, comes across as bitchy and/or aloof in person. While I am aware of this problem, there have been times I have been standing outside of myself, watching it happen. I'm hopeless.
I'll admit that part of me hopes that one day we'll meet (not entirely outside the realm of possibility - he lives in my area, ish.) and he'll see only my sexy brain and the fact that I'm not hideously ugly will just be icing.
So, why do I hate the internet? Because it has introduced me to smart, funny people who share my interests and I have become hopelessly infatuated. Damn you, interwebs!
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