Why does it bother me if some people I work with won't acknowledge my existence? For example: there is this girl who will barely avoid running me over, and NOT SAY ANYTHING! What the fuck, people? Did she think she had just nimbly avoided an invisible wall? And let me make this statement - I don't particularly like this girl and I have been known to make unkind comments about her gigantic ass and sub par weave. Yet I am still bothered by her refusal to make eye contact or mumble "excuse me" after almost bowling me over with her enormous backside.
Normally, I'm a "do unto others" person, but I find myself falling into the trap of expecting people to be nice to me - regardless of my behavior toward them. Hi, Queen of the Double Standard, here. What I don't understand is why I immediately go to a violent place. Why do I want to punch people? I just passed by this chick on my way to the bathroom and she (surprisingly) didn't make eye contact. My 1st thought was, "I could probably knock her on her dumpy ass with a swift uppercut." Completely unnecessary, no? Indeed.
I get that we all have violent thoughts - I used to imagine running over my ex-husbands new fiance with my car - but are these violent thoughts signs of a deeper issue? Do I not release my emotions enough? Can I, one day, be a good mediator even while I'm thinking about burying my fist in someone's face? Sure, why not? As I said, we all have violent thoughts. It's just a matter of NOT acting on them. Must. channel. anger.
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