Get a Mop

Everyone? Can I have your attention for a moment?

Thank you. Here's what I want everyone to do. Take a deep breath. That's right; in through the nose, out through the mouth. Good. Now another one. Good.

You can smell that, can't you? Taste it in the back of your throat? It tastes kind of like blue? Anybody have any idea what that is? No one? What that is, my friends, is the smell of crazy leaking all over the place.

Now maybe it's the unseasonable warmth. I always get a bit rammy when the weather turns. There's something about the softening of the air, an indefinable sense of anticipation, that makes me all squirmy. What ever it is; I can feel the crazy oozing through the cracks. It's making me think about stuff I'd prefer not thinking about. I want to do cartwheels and backflips and make unnecessary and unwarranted declarations of - something. I want something major to happen. Good major, of course. I want to climb out of my skin. I feel like the only way to release the pressure is to lay on the floor and scream at the ceiling. It feels a bit like being angry but without the desire to hit things.

I know I'm not crazy in the conventional sense but I need a word, or phrase, for what I'm feeling. anticipation doesn't cover it and pleasant tension just sounds stupid. That, and it's not all pleasant. When the pressure gets to be too much, I almost feel like I'm coming apart at the seams. That what's inside cannot be contained by the skin.

It'll pass; it always does. Please don't 302 me.